Faith

They say that if you do Crossfit, you should be able to do anything, like run a marathon. Crossfit will make you a well-rounded athlete and damn it, you can do anything if you just do your Crossfit! Go run a marathon on Tuesday if you want - you've done Helen before! Well, I'm not quite ready for a marathon yet, but if you remember a few months ago I signed up for a half-marathon. This is coming up in a few weeks. Most people train for something like this. I've been doing Crossfit. Most people run various distances multiple times a week. I do pull-ups. I also do running drills. But before yesterday, I had never run more than 4 miles at a time.


So Saturday morning, I ran a 5K - 5KLove. It was a lovely event and actually, it was a little more than a 5K - 3.31 miles according to my Garmin. I ran it at a 9:23 pace, which is a good pace for me. Could I have run it a little faster? Maybe. But there will always be another 5K.


Sunday morning was a preview run for the Eugene Women's Half Marathon. It was advertised as an 8 mile preview run of the course. This was a test of my dedication. I couldn't sleep in. I had run the day before. But I knew I had to do this. So I showed up on Sunday morning with the number 8 in my mind and the promise of a mimosa at the finish. The organizer then said it was really a 7.15 mile run and then gave us a map. He explained the map and said he didn't want anyone to get lost. No problem!


So we start running and it's along the bike path and I'm following a couple women who walked every once in a while, then would run a slightly faster pace then me. After the 4.5 mile mark, I decided to walk a little too. Then we weren't seeing the other runners so much. I just kept following, keeping up enough so I could see them. Then another group of women passed me and caught up with the couple ahead of me. Then they all stopped and congregated and looked at the map. Then they looked at me. 'Do you know where we're going?' All I could think was that they better know where they're going because in my head, I'm only running one more mile. But they didn't, and we went out of our way. As we circled back downtown, we ran into other people who followed the right path. I clocked in at 1:24 for 7.86 miles. Not bad for my first long run after a 5K. 


I was surprised how I felt during and after the race. I didn't feel nauseous at all. I'll feel nauseous during a one mile run, but not the 7 mile run. I ate some eggs and grapes beforehand. Not like, together or anything. Anyway... I feel really stupid for saying this, but my feet hurt like hell at the end of the run and I hadn't even considered my feet hurting. My back was feeling pretty bad too. My back was hurting most of the week - I think it was due to all the flying/driving done the weeks before. The run just killed it though. This could lead to a long post about sports bras, but not right now. Too much to say.


I ran a lot this weekend. I know I run more than the average non-runner, but I don't think I run that much. I'm putting a lot of faith in Crossfit and hoping that by going religiously, I'll be able to finish this half marathon in under 2:30. I'm pretty sure I can do that.


What will help me along the way? 

My Garmin, of course! It keeps track of everything! Pace, time, distance, heart rate (if I ever figure that thing out), elevation, laps, whatever! Then I plug it into the computer and it spits out all these numbers. Then I sync it to a website that posts it to facebook to annoy all my friends! How fun! I get really mad when it runs out of batteries or I forget it - what's the point of running if I don't have proof of what i just did? Then I'd never know I ran a 9:23 pace on Saturday and a 10:47 pace on Sunday. Honestly, if I didn't have my Garmin, I wouldn't be running as much as I have been, which isn't much, but I'm hopeful that it's enough.

Lift Like A Girl

At the end of work today, like most days, I went to change before I left. As I opened the door to the hallway, a big plant was in the way. Then I heard a furious, "Oh, sorry, sorry," and saw that some guys were painting near the elevators. One guy moved the plant and let me through. Another guy, who was sitting on his ass while others were painting, said something to the effect of, 'You really pushed that door hard. What, do you lift weights or something?" "Uh, yeah," I said as I quickly walked past with my gym bag. I didn't quite catch what he said after that, but it was along the lines of, "Wonder what it's like to be her husband." Like, kind of ...not even offensive or derogatory, just really, really old-fashioned. They didn't say anything when I walked past a few minutes later in my gym shorts and tank, although I should have flexed my arms and punched him in the face.


After work, I did 25 squat clean thrusters (65#) and 50 chest to bar pull-ups (with a red band). I bet he didn't.


But people don't really think like that, do they? I think he realized it was stupid when he said it, whatever he said. 


Tomorrow, LifeAsRx is having a 20% off sale and I might order this shirt:

I do lift like a girl. And I'm getting stronger every day. So suck it, lazy painter guy who's not even painting. I do lift weights, and someday I might even be as strong as the other girls in the gym. 

Hiatus

I'm writing this from the Gerald R. Ford* Airport in Grant Rapids, Michigan. I just got into Michigan and I won't be back until Tuesday. I also just had family visiting in Oregon, which was awesome. This also means I haven't been to Crossfit very much lately. And I've been eating all cruddy. I'm doing the things I need to be doing, but this is one of those times when I really wish there was an extra hour or two in the day. I like routine. I need routine. This is why Crossfit works for me.


I have worked out. Last Friday we went to Crater Lake and hiked down to the lake. It's only a mile, but it's a hell of a mile. When it was time to walk up, my sister knew my nephews would go slow. I said I needed to go fast. I finished about 10 minutes before they did (but who's keeping track?) Here's my view on the very first leg:

My nephew was very impressed with my speed going up the hill.


I miss Crossfit when I'm not there. I went on  Tuesday because it sounded like fun. We did a bunch of tests. I imagine we might do these again at some point. I had two big achievements. First, I did 4 dead hang pull-ups with the tan (or purple) band. This is the band you use when you almost don't need a band anymore. I almost did a real one after, but I didn't have it in me. I also ran a mile in 8:36. I'm pretty sure this is my best mile time. It felt good. I mean, it was hot as hell outside, but I managed. I need to get used to that kind of pace.


I'm planning on running a little the next few days, and running a lot in August. Right now, in order to really improve my physical strength and well-being, I need a serious nap.


*If Gerald Ford was from my city, I really wouldn't brag about it.

Music to Crossfit To

If you walk into a Crossfit box or watch any Crossfit video, you're bound to hear some terrible music. I'm not sure if it's supposed to make us work harder or make us angry or what, but I'm over it. I do like Tool, who often come up in the mix. I can stand Rage Against the Machine if I'm doing pull-ups. But I'm really getting tired of all this new hard rock daddy-doesn't-love-me crap we have to listen to during the WODs. I guess the real motivation would be to finish the WOD faster so I can go outside and not listen to it anymore. Lately, it seems like our box is moving more towards the Beastie Boys and away from whoever's playing the Warped Tour this year, which is a move in the right direction.


My preferences for workout music differ from what's typically played in the box.  Once in a while I'll speak up and advocate for Guns 'n Roses or Jane's Addiction, but it never lasts long. I used to take this Body Combat class at a globo gym and we would punch and kick to Christina Aguilera and Pink. Good stuff.


Maybe that's why I "like" running so much. I can listen to whatever I want. I set my playlists for the approximate time I want to finish that distance, so my 5K lists run from 27-30 minutes. This is the one I've listened to the most:


In a Big Country - Big Country
Love is a Battlefield - Pat Benetar
Filthy Gorgeous - Scissor Sisters
Supersonic - Oasis
Rebel Yell - Billy Idol
Live Your Life - TI
Palace of the Brine - Pixies


It's a little random but it works for me. I usually feel like singing out loud when Filthy/Gorgeous comes on, and I know that I should be near Target when the Pixies start. 


I made a mistake when I put together my latest one and made it a little too long, so when I was running a 5K in May, I thought I was getting a PR, then realized I was about 30 seconds too slow.


What You Waiting For? - Gwen Stefani
Take On Me - A-ha
Barracuda - Heart
God is a DJ - Faithless
Hella Good - No Doubt
When Love Takes Over - David Guetta
Closer - Ne-yo


So I just took Hella Good out, since I already have Gwen Stefani on there. I like having a longer dance song in the middle because I know I'll be about a mile further by the end of it. God is a DJ is perfect because it's 8 minutes long and it varies enough withing the song to keep it interesting. I also like hearing, "This is my church. This is where I heal my hurts" while I'm running. It makes sense to me.


So I'm not even sure what I'm doing tonight. I might be running or I might be doing Fight Gone Bad. If it's the latter, I'm sure we'll be listening to some terrible music while wall balls hit me in the face. If it's the former, it's up to me to decide how to get through it.

Oprah Knows Best

I just watched a very special Oprah. She had the author of a book I haven't read, "Women Food and God." 

Yeah, I'll probably order it or put my name on the waiting list at the library or something. I was thinking about my eating habits this weekend. I think I eat like a dog. No, not Beneful. A dog's instinct is to eat what's in front of them because in the wild, they might not know when they'll eat again. I know in my head that I don't have to eat everything in the house. But sometimes I do. And I know I'm sabotaging everything I work for. But I still do it. I'm the same way with money too, but that's for a different blog, a different time.

So Oprah and her writer buddy talked about this book and the audience had read the book and they had their sob stories and their questions. It comes back to mindfulness and recognizing what hunger feels like and capturing that moment when you want something and recognizing that moment and seeing the spirituality in it. Or something like that. But Oprah did say something that applies to what we do in Crossfit:

"The guidelines mean nothing unless you're willing to do the work."

For me it's stress and boredom. And it's about wanting to feel a different feeling. I don't want to be bored. I'll have some chocolate. Stress sucks and I can't get out of it, so I might as well eat something and give myself something else to do. This isn't how I want to be. And it could be a fear of failure and a whole lot of other things. There's a lot in my head that I'm not putting down here, but trust me. I can do better, but it will take a lot of relearning. 

I put the work into Crossfit. I go like 5 times a week, even when I don't feel like it. Maybe I need some friends or something. But if I can put the same work into Crossfit as I put into eating, a year from now I'll be the person I know I can be.

Oh Oprah, you're so wise.

Lessons Learned

Lately I've been thinking about how to apply the mental toughness we learn in Crossfit to everyday life. Our coach has even been posting about it on our website (even though I've been thinking about it before he brought it up). 


Many times in Crossfit, I want to stop. Even right when we start the WOD, I want to stop. But I keep going. I always keep going. I know I can make it to a point where I'll be proud of myself and happy with my outcome. It's not easy. My body hurts. I almost started crying during a workout last week that involved doing rounds of 10 deadlifts because I thought the weight I was using was too heavy - but I finished. I'll feel like I'm slower than everyone else. I'll feel like I just can't do what I'm supposed to do. There are many situations in my life when I feel the same way.


The difference is that in Crossfit, the pain only lasts so long. Maybe you'll need a longer than usual recovery time - a few days at the most (or a week if you do Angie). You'll get through that mental block, finish the WOD, and move on with your life. In life, when you move through the discomfort of work or relationships or family or anything and you make a big decision, you take a risk, that decision can have lifelong implications. 


One of these lessons that we learn in Crossfit is that if you work really hard, you will see results. I know this. It takes discipline. It's not easy. I changed my eating habits last year. I became addicted to showing up to this place and working out with these people. I know that if I want real change in my life, I need to commit. I need discipline. I need to write every day and I need to take risks. It's a lot to take on, but I might be ready now. If I could apply the same discipline to my writing as I apply to Crossfit, ...that thought is beyond my imagination right now. I just need to make it happen.

Not Winning

That's something I'm doing these days - not winning. Yesterday and today was the end of our Spring Leaning Challenge. We did the same tests and workouts three months ago. Our tests included:


Max effort pull-ups (I used a red band)
Max effort overhead squats (I did 35#)
Max box jumps in 1 minute (20" box)
Max effort handstand push-ups (yeah, right)
Max effort L-sit (you'd recognize it if you saw it)
800m run


My scores from 3 months ago are on the left - scores from yesterday in bold on the right

Max effort pull-ups - 16/24

Max effort overhead squats -  3/15

 Max box jumps in 1 minute - 26/ 28

Max effort handstand push-ups 0/0

Max effort L-sit - 6:04/6:34

800m run 3:44/3:46

Gee, good thing I've been spending all that time working on my running. In all honesty, when I looked back at my running score, I thought it was faster than usual the first time around and I didn't expect to beat it. But then I saw that most everyone improved in all of the categories. Well, yesterdays tests were only 25% of the challenge. Then there's today.

Today's workout is one of the worst workouts ever. Holding a 15# plate, you have to do:

20-15-10

Thrusters

Overhead lunges

Burpees

200m run

Super sucktastic.I remember doing this back in March. It was just the worst. Lunges are bad enough, especially for short people that have to go the same distance as people with long legs, but when you have to hold weight over your head - come on! The burpees were just cruel. But I thought that this was the only chance I had to win this thing. The first time I did the workout in 17:48. Today I did it in 15:04. I was still drooling and had snot flying out of my nose, like the first time, but I managed to do it 2:44 quicker.

The workouts are where I really show my improvement. I remember when we did Fran early in the year and for some reason, it was just torturous for me. I could not get the last 9 pull-ups done for the life of me. But then when I did it a few months later, with the same band and weight, it was almost easy. I like this aspect of Crossfit - comparing what you did then to what you can do now. We're so much more capable than we think.

And speaking of being awesome, I managed to do a real pull up for the first time at 5:40 Friday night, June 25. Clay witnessed it. I've been trying to do the kipping pull-ups for a while now and on Friday I tried a dead hang and managed to get my chin above the bar. That's a pretty big accomplishment. Next the kipping. Then the workouts RX. Then, the world!

The Problem with Paleo

1. It's time-consuming
2. It's exhausting
3. For some of us, we tend to think about the things we can't have rather than the things we can have.


I usually write about #3. Today I'm going to talk about the first two. And I'm going to preface this by saying that I don't even have kids and I can't imagine where all of you amazing women get your energy to get through your day. Seriously. I'm just a girl in the world trying to make the right decisions for me (and any future kids I may have). And I even have someone making me dinner most days, so I really don't have a place to complain.


Many societies value food and sharing time with people while preparing and eating food. Ours does not. Many people still go with the 'Eat as much as you can as fast as you can so you can watch more TV/go to the monster truck rally/shop at Wal-Mart.' As food production has progressed (that's so not the right word), we have meals in a box/on a tray/in a can that we can just zap and be done with it. 


When did we get so busy? Do we have to be this busy? When did preparing food become such a hassle that nobody has time for? 


The reason that paleo, or any other eating plan where you actually have to think about what you're putting in your body, will take a long time to catch on is that preparing food is not a priority. Filling up is a priority. Tonight I got home from my softball game. I hardly even did anything in the game, or all day for that matter (besides run 3 miles and clean the house like crazy), but I was exhausted leaving the game. But I knew we didn't have enough food in the house to make the right decisions. So we run to the store first and pick up a rotisserie chicken, some fruit, bacon, eggs, etc. Then we get home. So tired. I have to talk myself into a simple task like hardboiling the eggs so I can take them to work as snacks. The 9-5 thing - uy - you have to go in prepared to eat healthy or you're fighting a losing battle. So I put the eggs on, I do the dishes, I grind the coffee, I fill the dog's water bowl, I should be ready to go tomorrow morning. But I don't do this every Sunday. If I'm going to do it right, I have to prepare. I can't let work stress be my downfall into eating more chocolate. I can't let myself get so hungry in the morning that I go to the store at noon and get a coconut macaroon (not like that happened on Friday). 


The irony is that eating better food is supposed to give you more energy. I think today's one of those rare days where I didn't eat enough food, but maybe that's what I'll keep track of this week - my energy level. I should be all set for the next few days, so I'll see if I still have energy on Wednesday to stick to the plan and get things ready the night before.


I can learn to love cooking. I can love to learn to eat healthy. Because you know what's really great - fitting into a size 4*. That's pretty freakin' great.


*This has only worked with the pants at the J Crew outlet, but I'm sure other brands in that size will fit me soon.

Movement

This week is benchmark week at Eugene Crossfit. That means we get to do really hard workouts all week. Yay! Monday was the hardest one on the list - Angie. 100 pull-ups, followed by 100 push-ups, followed by 100 sit-ups, followed by 100 squats. It's a bitch! I had done Angie twice before. Scaling back means a lot of things with Angie. You can use bands and do push-ups on your knees, and you can do fewer reps. The first time I did Angie, in October, I did 50 pull-ups and push-ups and 70 sit-ups and squats. After I finished, I knew I could have done more of the last two. The next time we did Angie, I did 75 of everything. Even then I knew I could have done 100 of the last two. This time, I did 100 for everything. I used the blue band for pull-ups. They were awful, but not as bad as I thought they would be. I used bands to assist me with push-ups - blue and tan - and then I started doing them on my knees after about 20 because my arms were burning. Push-ups are one of my biggest goats. They hold me back so much. But I finished the workout and felt pretty good about life.


Then Karen, my buddy, was still doing sit-ups and said something about quitting. There's no quitting in Crossfit! So I got down on the mat and finished the last 25 sit ups with her. So did the rest of the women there. It was awesome! Then we took turns doing squats with her. Those squats can burn after a while, so doing 10 at a time was fine with us. Here's me and Karen taking care of business.

Hell yeah. She finished under 30 minutes! That's a tough workout!


What does this have to do with movement? Yeah, I'm having a tough time moving my arms today. Straightening them doesn't feel too good. Lifting anything overhead seems impossible. Still, I managed to do Grace today, which is 30 clean and jerks. I definitely could have done more weight on any other day, but just showing up was an accomplishment for me, so I was happy with just doing it. Later this week we have wall balls and thrusters and pull-ups, oh my! I'm pretty sure doing anything on Saturday is out of the question.


Oh, and my friends and I had an impromptu Lady Gaga dance party the other night. I haven't danced in a while. I used to all the time. I need to incorporate dancing into my workouts. We all do.

Zombie Apocalypse

I keep seeing my friends post updates saying that they're going to lose weight - they're going to exercise and get back into shape. I'll be honest with you - I have a hard time believing any of them. It's not that I don't believe that my friends can do it, but I've been there, and you actually have to DO it.


For many people, exercising is one more thing they have to try to fit into the day instead of something that should be part of their day, like sleeping and eating. Exercise isn't a choice - it's a basic element of survival. Tired after a day of work? Many people will choose to zone out on the couch. What's the better choice? Do something physically challenging or at least take a damn walk.


The way we live has made it very easy for us to be complacent. But is that how YOU want to live? The word 'life' insinuates some kind of movement or energy, but YOU have to exert that energy. YOU have to make it happen.


Here's the deal - if there's a zombie apocalypse, do you really want to be 'that guy' who can't walk fast enough to get away from a zombie? Because zombies don't move very fast. If you don't include exercise as part of your day and you have trouble walking around the block, all of us crossfitters will have made it to our safe place with our weapons and energy. (I think a kettlebell would be a good weapon in this situation) You can be a zombie for all I care. Not me, fatty. We can't let them win.


**edited to add that I did not see Mark's Primal Apple post yesterday about Primal Preparations for the Post Apocalypse. That is a weird coincidence. But hey, stock up!

Mindfulness

A very wise woman once told me that the key to emotional eating is mindfulness. I've heard about this concept before. Think about what you're eating. Enjoy every bite. Etc, etc. I eat too fast to do that. But I was thinking about mindfulness last night in terms of the WOD's. One of the many reasons I love Crossfit is that you can't really think about anything else while you're doing a WOD. You have to think about what you're doing or else you'll screw up. You'll hurt yourself or somebody else. Then I thought that it would be great if someone could record my thoughts while doing a workout. Say I was going to do Helen after work on a Tuesday. I can imagine this would be my thought process as we were getting ready to do the workout.


OK, I'm nervous. Maybe I should throw up. Or at least pee. I don't have time. OK, I can do this.
3-2-1 Go!
Running. I hate running. My ass feels like it's bouncing. Great. I'm not supposed to swing my arms in front of me. I'll pretend like I'm cross-country skiing. I really feel like walking. I can't walk. I never walk. It's only 400 meters. I've done this a million times. I'm not the slowest one here today. That's good. Wait til the pull-ups. Then I'll be the slowest one. Why can't I run faster? I keep trying to run faster! I really want to walk, but I can't walk. Keep running. It's almost done.
Ok, kettlebells. One pood. I should have tried for one and a half. I'm totally strong. OK, I'll do 10 in a row and see how I'm doing. I hope none of the kettlebells fly out of anyone's hands and hit me. That would be a disaster. OK. I totally rule the kettlebells and should do one and a half pood next time. I can totally do 25 in a row. I'm awesome. My hands are getting sweaty. I hope it doesn't fly out of my hands and hit somebody. That would be even worse. 
OK, pull-ups. Only 12. I can totally do 12 pull-ups in a row. I've done this before. Why is the red band so much harder than the blue? OK, I can do  6 pull-ups in a row. I hate pull-ups so much. I can't finish this workout. Yes I can. I've done it before. 6 more. OK, 3 at a time. I know I can do this. OK. First round done. Now back to running.


This is typically where I zone out until I get to the last round of running.


Why am I so slow? Where is everyone else? How did three people finish and I still have one more round to go? It's those damn pull-ups that slow me down. I can totally make up time on the running, right? This is where I can go faster. .... OK, maybe not. But this is the last time I have to run. No more running today after this. If I can make it around this corner, I'll be good. I've run this a million times.
I'm so glad I didn't use one and a half pood. There's no way I could have done this. I'll do 12 in a row. I know I can do 12 in a row, then a really quick rest. My hands are so sweaty. Damn it! This is where I can make up time. I can totally get all these in a row.
OK. Only 12 pull-ups. Then I'm done. I can do these. I know I can. 4 at a time. OK, 8 more. ... 6 more. DAMN IT! Why do these goddamn pull-ups always do this to me? I have 6 more to go and I'm going to be doing them 2 at a time. I HATE PULL-UPS! Why can't I do real ones yet? I've been doing this for almost a year! I would be done if I had used the blue band. Two more, then a break. I'm so close to being done. Why is Jeremy yelling at me? Why are people cheering me on? STOP IT!!! This is going to take me a while to do these 3 stupid pull-ups! One at a time now. My arms are done. Use your body to pull you up. Damn it! One more! I can do this. I can do this.


Time.


That's my idea of mindfulness during a workout.

Wagons

So much of Crossfit is nutrition, which is why this lifestyle is so difficult. I fell off the wagon. For most of May, I was eating a lot of sugar. It was stress or boredom or ... something. But a funny thing happened. So a couple weeks ago, we did the workout Cindy, which is a pretty grueling workout (20 minutes of pull-ups, push-ups, and squatting). The next day I ran a 5K. Then a rest day. Then the Filthy Fifty, which I completed (not quite RX, but I'm getting there). I can't believe I completed it. Yes, there was a time limit, but I was close enough and I kept going. Anyway, the next day was the first day of Crossfit Endurance, and I had to run another 5K. I got a horrible time (for me) - it was 1:30 slower than my 5K earlier that week. My knee hurt. I was mad at myself. My calves were super sore. So I had every intention of going back to Crossfit later that week (taking some rest first, of course). But I was sitting in my office on Friday and I just felt awful. I felt like allergies were coming on and I could barely keep my eyes open, even after taking something. I went home and drank a cup of coffee, and I slept all afternoon. I guess I needed it.


But then I slept in on Saturday. I didn't go to Crossfit Saturday morning. I never sleep in unintentionally. It was like my body had just had it. I still ate poorly on Saturday (we went to a casino, which had a buffet), but then decided that I needed to get back on track, both with workouts and with eating. I just didn't want my body to feel awful anymore.


So I've cut the artificial sugar and gluten. I'm definitely not full-on paleo, but I'm certainly better than I was earlier this month. I've done some tough workouts and I'm going back tomorrow. As much as it irritates the hell out of me, there's something to this nutrition thing.


There was an article on Crossfit Journal this week about a study done about emotional fitness and Crossfit. It was a small study - done in one gym. The participants were supposed to stick to the diet and workout regimen for 7 weeks. That's a long time. The ones who finished certainly scored higher on their emotional scales, but I'm more interested in the ones who didn't finish. What made them go back? Was it keeping up with workouts? I doubt that. I think people can be pretty consistent when they're having fun and seeing results. But the eating part - I'm guessing that's where they fell off the wagon. Eating is, for many of us, emotional. It shouldn't be, but it is. So what can Crossfit do about that?

LOST

I have a few things to say about LOST and I think I have more readers here than elsewhere, so this post is going to be about LOST. 


I was OK with the finale. It wasn't perfect, by any means. But the ending was moving and Vincent was OK, so it was fine with me. I've kept up with LOST on Slate with writers who were mixed about the final season. The page I link to suggests the final season without the flash-sideways. We didn't really need it. It wasn't really real anyway. If all it was doing was leading to this final purgatory thing, I don't know if it was worth it. I like the message at the end - that in order to get out of limbo, we have to let go (boy, do I know that lesson) - but was it the best way to get there? Instead, the writers could have focused on the island story, which was actually pretty good (aside from the temple people). But instead they chose to show everyone meeting each other in an alternate reality. I'm not sold.


My biggest disappointment from this season was their abandonment of Walt's story. I get it. The kid grew up. He went from this:

to this:

While all of the other castaways looked the same. I get it. But he was special. He was important. They made that very clear in the first 3 seasons. Then they just gave up. His dog was more important - Vincent made it into the last scene! They're creative people, but it didn't seem that way this last season.


I made a prediction a few weeks ago when I had the opportunity to come up with the worst possible ending. Frank would crawl up from the ocean, they'd all get on the plane and crash into another island. Well, the last part didn't happen, but really? Really LOST? I know we didn't technically see Frank die, but we did see him get hit by a big metal door on a submarine that was going underwater. Frank doesn't have any special powers. He's just Frank. And they did it. They flew the plane away. What's Richard supposed to do in the real world? Miles has his Nikki and Paolo diamonds, so he's OK, but Richard's like 150 years old. I'm not happy that Kate lived either, but whatev.


I'm not angry with the writers/producers, but I want more. I expect something better. Can we have a do-over? I'd like to rewrite season 6. I'll keep a lot of what they offered - there really was a lot of good stuff there - but I'm not going to cop out. I'll give it a real ending, not with answers, but with redemption. 


And despite my ranting, I actually did appreciate the finale, but the more I think about it, the more I change my mind. It has changed each day. That's probably what the producers wanted anyway.


Ketllebells.

Plateau

In Crossfit, we strive to get better. Lift heavier weights. Do more reps. Run faster. I realized this weekend that on many levels, I have plateaued. In January, I was able to deadlift 195 lbs. Once. Not since. In February, I ran a 5K in 29 minutes. I've come within 30 seconds since then, but haven't beat it yet. I've been about 5 pounds away from my goal weight for ... how long? There's a reason I don't have a scale in the house.


I have made improvements. I know this. I'm able to use a red band instead of a blue band for pull-ups. I cleaned 80 pounds. I haven't had a meltdown in a while. But I feel like I'm stuck. I want to get faster...and stronger...and lighter. Am I really putting the effort into it?


My nutrition has been questionable lately. I still struggle with sugar. I just can't make the commitment to cut it out of my life.


I'm sure there are other factors too. Maybe I'm not pushing myself hard enough. Maybe I'm not running as fast as I can because I don't know how fast I can run. I don't know. But getting better matters to me. Maybe I need to set some new goals and actually work towards them.


Crossfit Endurance starts this week. Someone either read my mind or my blog and saw that I needed help if I'm going to run a half-marathon in September. On Sunday, I ran a 5K - Bark in the Park - a fundraiser for Greenhill Humane Society. My team raised $450. We ran the race in 29:30. Definitely not a record, but it's hard to run fast when you're dodging dogs. Always an excuse.

Kate ran a few steps ahead of me the whole time. Next time, I'll beat her.

Kicks

I bought some new shoes a few weeks ago.

They're not the kind of shoes I normally buy. I won't even get near those socks with the toes. They just look stupid. But these are shoes that many crossfitters wear. They help you keep your weight in your heels, which you are supposed to do when you squat and lift weights. I have trouble with that. I've worn them a few times. They look a little silly, but not at Crossfit. You get mad respect when you show up wearing these. It's funny because the brochure shows people running around on trails and climbing up mountains wearing these shoes. I don't want to get them dirty. 


They're also supposed to help with running. When we relearn to run, we learn that the front half of the foot should strike, not the heel. (try running barefoot on a sidewalk) That's hard to get used to. Running shoes have taught us that cushioning is good and their shoes will help us run faster. In reality, when you strike with your heel you're causing ankle and knee problems. I know I'm not much of a runner, but someday I hope I can keep up with the good ones. I even signed up for the Eugene Women's Half Marathon in September. I'm going to be regretting it in August. God help me.


The funny thing about wearing these shoes is that other shoes feel so heavy now. The nice 'running' shoes I have are pretty light, but recently I put on an older pair when I took my dog out.

They felt huge. It was like, 'Why do I have all this stuff around my feet? I don't need it!' I don't need these shoes dragging me down! I can do that myself!