I just went to Market of Choice to buy some food for the week. Tonight, everything I bought was organic and the meat was raised with food it should naturally eat. I really didn't buy much: carrots, cucumbers, 2 cartons of eggs, chicken, trail mix, salad, gluten free waffles, frozen fruit & veggies, and avocados. The total came to $45.24. All of this should keep me fed for hte next few days. It doesn't seem like it should cost me this much. And this is really just buying for myself; I don't have a family to buy for. It shouldn't cost this much to eat right. I didn't eat right last week. I said I would and I failed. The only thing that gets me, and this sounds soooooo stupid, is the candy jar in my boss's office. I know better. It doesn't make me feel good. But this is beyond paleo and beyond crossfit. With me, as with many people, there's been a lifelong connection between depression and food. It takes a lot of work for me to be happy and a lot of work for me to eat right. I do recognize the importance of both of these things for my well-being and I'll do my best this week. A lot of it comes down to having healthy snacks available at work; I just didn't plan last week. As far as the workouts, ugh. I should have done better with Monday's workout - pull-ups and double unders. Something was in my head again and the pull-ups got to me. I should have had a couple more sets of double unders to increase my reps. I don't know. Tuesday's workout was just brutal. Kettlebell swings, wall balls, and sit ups. I used a 1 pood kettlebell, which is 36 pounds. I felt all of those 36 pounds. I was just angry after that one. It wasn't fun. I wasn't proud. It just hurt. Anyway... Wednesday's workout was difficult for other reasons. It was a combination of cleans, knees to elbows, and box jumps. I became incredibly frustrated during the knees to elbows because I don't have a strong grip and my hands hurt - bad! I've seen pictures of guys ripping up their hands from pull-ups or other bar exercises and I can't do that. I have problems with my platelet count and if I start bleeding, it's bad news. My blood takes a while to clot. I know there are ways to work on grip and I need to do these things if I'm going to improve. It was just really frustrating for me during the workout. I couldn't get past it. Friday night's workout involved a series of 200m runs. I did OK considering I'm not fast and considering we couldn't see a substantial portion of the course. There was some uncertainty involving ice. But I did all right. My back has been hurting a lot for the past couple weeks. It's mainly my upper back and if this keeps up, I'll need to see my chiropractor. I bought one of those foam rollers to help my muscles, and I'll try to consistently use that. I feel like I should be getting better, but I don't feel like I am. We have a test this week with Helen, which we did 8 weeks ago. I know I'll do a lot better this time around. But still, there are areas where I'm not improving. My discipline needs to be practiced and not just talked about. That's a start.