Happy Up Here

A funny thing happened when I went home for the holidays. I flew into Chicago and had a great time. I met up with two of my favorite people and they really tried to convince me to move there. Who wouldn't? It's a fun city, especially for a single girl. And it would help me professionally too, since I'm more likely to find a good job there than I am here. Then I went to my family in Kalamazoo and I thought about it an awful lot. Then I came to the realization...

I'm actually pretty happy right now.

And it feels weird to say this. If you know anything about my past, you know that depression has been a constant in my life and just getting by has been the norm. But recently, my mood has been pretty good. I'm smiling more. I feel good about the future. And the awesome part is that I'm not taking anything for it right now. It's just how I am. 

I attribute much of this to the great friends that I've made here, mostly from Eugene CrossFit. I can't talk about them without getting all verklempt. They know what they mean to me. I also know how hard it is to find good friends as an adult. I'm not willing to give that up.

I also know that I have a lot of work to do. I have big goals for my professional life this year. And it will take a lot of work. But I need to focus on these things. I know I do.

I also have CrossFit goals. I'm joining the Oly lifting class so I can do some major work on my technique and start lifting the weight I should be able to lift. I've started coaching, which means I need to take my own training more seriously. I made big time gains last spring, but I haven't made any major gains since. I need that again.

January is traditionally a rough month for me, at least for the past 10 years. It's the month that my dad died and as much as I try not to think about it, sometimes it just comes up and I get overwhelmed with sadness. The weather out here generally doesn't help. But it is sunny today, so I'll take my dog to the park and get that sun while I can. I know how easily it can go away.

Anyway, I am grateful. And happy. So thanks. If you're reading this, you've most likely had a part in all of it.


Top 5

I have been feeling uninspired in the CrossFit writing world lately, but I've seen many lists today. Lists I can do. And I watched High Fidelity again recently. Here come some lists.

10 Things I Love About CrossFit
10. I'd rather live an active life than a passive life.
9. I hate certain moves (overhead squats, wall balls, rowing) but instead of avoiding them, I keep doing them so I can get better. They won't go away. Neither will life.
8. I can laugh at myself.
7. Statistics! 
6. You try, you do your best, and everyone supports you.
5. Sometimes it's all business. Sometimes it's like playtime.
4. I'm not really good at team sports. In CrossFit, I'm only accountable to myself.
3. Who knew lifting a bar from the ground to your shoulders could feel so awesome. I love cleans!
2. I get to teach it now.
1. All of you.

Top 5 CrossFit Moves
1. Double Unders
2. Kettlebell Swings
3. Cleans
4. Pull-ups
5. Push-ups

Top 5 Least Favorite WODs
1. Kelly (also one of my favorite people at the box)
2. Karen (also one of my favorite people at the box)
3. The Seven 
4. Anything that involves multiple reps of overhead squats. They make me frustrated. They make me cry.
5. That first wall climb WOD with toes to bar, box jumps and wall climbs. I fell on my face before the WOD and tripped over the box on my first round of box jumps. I spent much of the remaining 30 minutes lying on the floor, wondering what I was doing there. 

Top 5 Favorite WODs
1. Annie (my first leaderboard and my first RX girl workout. I love this workout)
2. Helen
3. This partner one with rowing and push-ups we did about a month ago. I don't know why I liked it so much, but I just felt f*ing awesome afterwards.
4. When we did all the lady WODs super-scaled on a Friday. That was so fun!
5. Probably the Games workout from last Spring when you had 5 minutes to clean and jerk 110 pounds. My previous PR was 100. The first time I tried, I couldn't clean it. I spent 5 minutes struggling. A couple days later, I tried again. 2 1/2 minutes into it, I cleaned it. So many people were cheering me on. And it was f*ing awesome.

Top 5 Albums of All Time
1. Garbage - Version 2.0
2. Depeche Mode - Violator
3. Royksopp - The Understanding
4. The Pixies - Doolittle
5. Radiohead - OK Computer